my god. so tired today. felt so damn sleepy. zZz...


have 1 extra period lor. idiotic shit. can't even stand dismissing at 1.50 den still wan me to study until 2.25. hmpf. where the hell did the extra period come frm anyway!?!?!?!?



anyway. stayed back to decorate the stupid classroom board. sonika helped me!!!! thanx again sugarcane!!!! actually she did most of the work lah. to crumple the aluminium foil all dat. den i only sit dere in put glitter glue on the signs which i didn't even make. was frm bryan oei's last time class. i'm a bloody slacker man.


after dat me n sonika found 3 mirrors on the teacher's table. den we started writing our whole class' names on dem wif glitter glue. is quite nice lor!!! really. except jun's name can't really be seen cos had to make space for jie ying's name. 2 of dem r now under my table n 1 is under sonika's table. have to find a place to paste dem up n must find good sticking tape. so dat it wun drop.


have to remember not to shove my bag under the table like i usually do.



stupid!!! went around collecting money. and only collected frm THREE ppl. pathetic sia. cos most of dem didn't bring no matter how many times i remind dem!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! grr. nicholas is my bouncer. wahaha. but he didn't even do anyting lor!!! juz stand dere or else he walk away den when i finish toking & collecting liao den he come back. haiz.



it is dangerous to bring huge amounts of money to sch. the envelope is pulling my skirt down cos it's so heavy. have to keep pulling it n folding it.



aiyah. tomorrow juz bring the list can liao lah. can i juz have an assistant so dat i can push the money carrying to him/her??????



tomorrow have to go find sok hua, wendy, linda, yiting, wee ying n dina. still got more but these r the most outstanding of all. today i was looking all over the place for linda. finally i saw yiting n she said linda was upstairs having class. so i passed the homecopy to her to give to linda.



u noe wat? i changed my mind. i rather have tan teow leng as my pe teacher than dat choo dunnowat'shisname.


he sux sia. so many 'expectations'. n so naggy some more. almost like steven wong (uh oh). but now steven wong is better. at least, less naggier than before. but dat choo dunnowat'shisname is so damn bloody naggy can?!?! wah kaox. almost fell asleep listening to his speech sia.


dat goes to show: be careful wif wat u wish for. it may juz come true.


anyway, took ht & wt. i realized dat not only me hated to take ht & wt. marselly, beatrice all dat oso dun like. the choo dunnowat'shisname ask me to record the ht & wt for dem den beatrice kept asking me to put her wt as 45 kg. but i didn't cos i'm SOOO honest!!!! anyway her real wt is juz 1 kg heavier anyway, if i'm not wrong. is dere any diff?!?!



the good news is i lost 5 kg. have to keep it up sia. exercise more!!! dat calvin goes jogging every morning AND evening during the hols lor!!! he told me. wah lau. he can become my fitness coach liao. den he say he keeping fit for ncc. den last time saw him during hols he so happy. cos he's a leader.



finally. tomorrow is friday.

YAY. i love wednesdays. i love the timetable for wednesday!!! wahaha. no MATHS AT ALL. i'm loving it baby.. no geog, no ss, no PE for once.


THREE periods of english ok!!! yay. the only bad ting is dat got chinese. bleah.


therefore, thursday is a good day to be late for sch. actually today me n lim were late. BUT dunno y nowadays sch keep starting later n later. i wanna be late one leh.


friday is not a good day. mon, tues n thurs r oso good days cos got A MATHS. yucky. maybe accumulate to 3 times late den can skip 2 whole periods of maths!!! whipee!!! [siao]


i hate thursdays. end ONE period later AND got BOTH maths AND got pe some more.


tink tomorrow taking ht & wt. haiz. i hate dis. i'm not overweight, i'm juz too short for my weight. last semester nvr take cos i heng ah. dat day sick den nvr come sch den daniel wee nvr take!! wahahahha.


speaking of daniel wee, lim told me dat he dislocated his arm n will take 1 mth to recover. she say tan teow leng take over, but not sure abt our class. i hope is the new blur teacher, mr choo. can bully him!!! *evil laugh*



today got the university of new south wales writing competition. so HARD lor!! idiotic shit. wat is dis man. halfway checking den the anselm paul come n say, 'must get a distinction..'


wah lau stress sia. i bet sure wun get one. i overshot 200 words liao.



today once step into band den play dat stupid doraemon liao. it sux man. stupid horn no melody & the stupid rythmn (sp??) so hard some more.



damnnnn. tomorrow is another day. got chatterji's class!!! dun care not gonna do her stupid hw she gave me like 1 mth ago. n i still owe anselm paul the national geographic tingy oso.




yay!! i didn't change my place!!! i screamed--ok, screeched--my protest against changing places. i dun understand y dat crystal & rachel dun wanna change place lor. ppl dun wanna sit in front dey dying to sit in front. dunno wat's their problem man. hmpf. but dat's good oso. can let those dat dun wanna sit in front dun sit in front.


i realized dat ear stix were not for me. so i changed back to ear studs. dey look & feel much better anyway.




have absolutely no idea how to decorate the stupid classroom. have to ask zafirah.



n tomorrow oso no recess for me. have to go around chasing the sec 4s to pay up for the syf photos, n have to find linda to give her the horn homecopies. hidayat papa is sponsoring me ONE WEEK recess!!!! starting frm tomorrow. cos i'm gonna do him a favor. haha. but it's not such a big deal, considering dat my recess only costs 50 cents for 1 packet of green tea. haiz. should've asked him to sponsor me one week lunch. stupid me.


oh shit. juz remembered tomorrow pe is before recess. gahhhhh. have to change all dat den waste time!!!!!!!!! den have lesser time to go n find ppl. must strengthen my legs. if not later tomorrow chou jin ah.



so much to blog, so little time.



last nite claudia ang played M2M's first album, shades of purple or someting like dat.



i still remember all their lyrics!! wahh. i still love 'pretty boy', although it sounds too sweety for me.



n besides, i dun tink marion is prettier than marit, or otherwise pronounced as marie. marit is prettier lor. but marion has a stronger voice.



i'm blogging crap.

have not blogged for many days. it's ok, anyway. i have not been in a good mood.


first of all, i should scream.





AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


dat's good. omg life sux. sch sux. everyting sux.



i hate the new classroom system. i hate the new classroom. IT IS JUZ NEXT TO SUNDARAM'S FORM CLASS OK. wah lan.


n everyday see her walking past. sit at the back den if use hp in class den dunno if got teacher suddenly walk past or not. next time must close the door. other than dat I LOVE MY PLACE. it has a good view. my whole column has a good view. i like the places dere. any other seat in class sux. esp the middle, i stress again.


now, instead of counting down the time to the next lesson, i m counting down the time to recess. or end of sch.




i m piled up wif hw. i shall ignore it n continue using the com. esp accounts. WAT THE HELL IS ONG SIEW CHIN DOING!?!?!!?!?



i dun even understand the stupid dunno wat bank tingy she was teaching today.



anyway. i stapled a hole in my left thumb nail yesterday during bio. erica lee kept looking at me. wat is her problem man. i only tok ONCE to yvonne ok.


anyway, to shut myself up i tried stapling a hole in my left thumb nail, which was long. i succeeded in 3 attempts. n excuse me, is the NAIL TIP ok, not the nail BED.


den i took the spider ear stud frm my right ear nforced it into the hole. it's was nice. except later i was sick of it n took it out n the hole was black cos the back of the ear stud was black n the colour rubbed off. dat's wat u get for 6 for $5 cheapo studs.


den the hole was so disgusting. look like a cancerous mole or wat. so i went home n cut, filed n buffed my nails. my nails need good care ok. both hands take 1 hr. must file in precise square shape lor. now my nails feel n look so clean n shiny n rosy pink + white. i have ezcema on my right middle finger. must be show too much liao. haha. it looks so disgusting n full of pus. haiz.


as i said, life sux.


the only ting good is dat babita's father is sponsoring 5 of us to go escape!! haha. escape THEME PARK lah. long time wanna go wif frens liao. haha. sit roller coaster esp the panasonic one. so nice lor!!! haha. wonder if lim will vomit??


n oso dat tan n me gonna watch initial d next mon. dunno if lim going or not. nicholas told me dat he watched it in jb already. n he said he threw my pilot super gel 0.5 blue pen away!!! so much for kindness. i lent it to him for his bio exam. hmpf.


anyway, back to initial d. nicholas oso said dat got one scene where zhou jie lun's character found out dat his gf was a prostitute!!! n he said zhou jie lun CRIED LOR!! WHILE DRIVING!!!


awwww. so sweet!!!! must see. i bet he looks extra cute when he cries.


n y the hell did edison chen shave his whole head for?????????? he looks better wif hair man.




enough of dat. i decided to takeout all my studs n put ear stix. SO GUAI KIA!!!!


wait a minute. i AM a guai kia. wahahahahahaha.


now u can hardly see my holes except the 2nd hole on my rite ear cos the ear stick is blue. scare me sia. tot the 3rd hole on my left ear close liao. idiotic. cannot fit a thick one in. now dat's the only one dat cannot accept thick ear stix. all the others can lor!! even the ones younger than dat one.


fine. i hate sch.

i FINALLY understand y 'to kill a mockingbird' is titled 'to kill a mockingbird', instead of 'bloody racism' or 'nigger-lover'.


as quoted directly frm pg 90 of 'to kill a mockingbird':

When he gave us our air rifles Atticus wouldn't teach us to shoot.Uncle Jack instructed us in the rudiments thereof; he said Atticus wasn't interested in guns. Atticus said to Jem one day, "I'd rather you shot at tin cans in the back yard, but I know you'll go after birds. Shoot all the bluejays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a mockingbird."

That was the only time I ever heard Atticus say it was a sin to do something, and I asked Miss Maudie about it.

"You father's right," she said. "Mockingbirds don't do one thing but make music for us to enjoy. They don't eat up people's gardens, don't nest in corncribs, they don't do one thing but sing their hearts out for us. That's why it's a sin to kill a mockingbird."






there. i tell u it's hard to keep putting capital letters ok. but gotta respect the book. anyway. a negro is like a mockingbird. cos mockingbirds dun do anyting wrong wat. den negroes oso didn't do anyting wrong, but ppl r prejudiced against dem cos dey're black. therefore, juz as it is a sin to kill a mockingbird, it is oso a sin to kill a negro, or anyone dat didn't do anyting wrong. therefore, the book is titled 'to kill a mockingbird', cos ppl r trying to wipe out negroes, or rather 'mockingbirds'.



WHOAAAAAAAAA. deep tinking huh.



i m so smart. wahaha.



but haven't finish reading the book, so dunno whether the tom robinson will lose the case or not. juz started part 2. part 2 is better than part 1 lor. part 1 juz toking crap only. waste my time reading it man. doesn't even have connection. hmpf.



YAY. i found out another 2 secrets again!!!~ wahaha. i m bursting wif secrets. now i noe i can too keep secrets ok. it is safe to tell me secrets!!! i m not a big mouth as many ppl tink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SOB. i m misjudged!!!! sob sob sob. n no, the secrets does not have anyting to do wif u, anonymous person.



arghhhhhhgahahaggahagahaghah. sch starts tomorrow. I HATE SCH. or rather, the new system. i m 100% not loving sch anymore. i used to ok, cos got MOTIVATION. but now dun have. damn. juz looking forward to see wat dat jaslin chew has to say. last time she tok half way den dun wanna tok den she say sch reopen den explain.



I DUN WANNA SIT IN FRONT!!!!



ok, fine. i dun mind sitting in front, if it's at the corner. i hate all seats in the middle columns. like the 2nd & 3rd columns. dunno y lah.



& i hope i dun sit next to any quiet ones. can't stand sitting next to quiet ppl. although jaslin is quiet oso. the only really quiet ppl i m close to is jaslin & lim shih yann. but lim shih yann is getting louder & louder!!!! n at least can communicate wif jaslin chew rite. haiz.





I M SO NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO SCH.



the fact dat i haven't started any hw except english is another matter.



should have transferred sch when i had a chance. still say wat, "we will consider having lockers bcos we noe ur bags r heavy."



YEAH RITE. now no more homeroom system still consider wat hell lockers lah.



n besides, my bag is not heavy. it doesn't even weigh 1 kg. i dun tink it weighs more than 999g. haha.


ha. ha. ha. the heaviest ting in my bag is my file. cos all the teachers give notes now. hahahahaha.


except social studies. geog. maths. chinese.



BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.



juz took a personality disorder test which i found out frm keslyn's blog. i have a dependent pesonality disorder!! *gasp* it says here:


Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. Dependents often remain in abusive relationships. Over-sensitivity to disapproval is common. Dependents often feel helpless and depressed.


Symptoms of dependent personality disorder:

Difficulty making decisions
Feelings of helplessness when alone
Suicidal thoughts upon rejection
Submissiveness
Deeply hurt by mild criticism or disapproval
Unable to meet ordinary demands of life


OMGGGGG. OH MY GOD!!!!!


den after dat i took a Dante's Inferno Test, to see which level of hell i will be banished to after death. dere r 9 levels, & i'm at level 6!!


Level 6 - The City of Dis
You approach Satan's wretched city where you behold a wide plain surrounded by iron walls. Before you are fields full of distress and torment terrible. Burning tombs are littered about the landscape. Inside these flaming sepulchers suffer the heretics, failing to believe in God and the afterlife, who make themselves audible by doleful sighs. You will join the wicked that lie here, and will be offered no respite. The three infernal Furies stained with blood, with limbs of women and hair of serpents, dwell in this circle of Hell.



as u can see, level 6 is for ppl who dun believe in God. Heretics, as the test calls it. oh well. wat can i do. ppl can't force me to believe in God anyway. does God really exist??


dun kill me now.

Losing Grip
Avril Lavigne

Are you aware of what u make me feel?
Baby
Right now I feel invisible to you
Like I'm not real.
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you?
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say.

Pre-chorus:
I was left to cry there
Waiting outside there
Grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

Chorus:
Why should I care?
Cos you weren't there when I was scared
I was so alone
You
You need to listen
I'm starting to trip
I'm losing my grip
And I'm in this thing alone.

Am i just some chick you placed beside you
To take somebody's place?
When you turn around can you recognize
My face?
You used to love me,
You used to hug me.
But that wasn't the case.
Everything wasn't okay.

Repeat pre-chorus
Repeat chorus

Bridge:
Crying out loud,
I'm crying out loud.
Crying out loud,
I'm crying out loud.
Yeah
Open your eyes.
Open them wide.

Why should I care?
Cos you weren't there
When I was scared
I was so alone.

Why should I care?
Cos you weren't there
When I was scared
I was so alone.

Why should I care?
If you don't care
Then I dont care
We're not going anywhere.

Why should I care?
Cos you weren't there
When I was scared
I was so alone.

Why should I care?
If you don't care
Then I don't care
We're not going anywhere.

i learnt 2 new tings on thursday:


1) i cannot live without electricity.
2) it's easier to sleep when it's hot than when it's cold.


wah lau. thursday no electricity lor!! stupid hdb. off the electricity frm 9 am to 5.30 pm lor. ONE WHOLE DAY. i could have gone out wif firdaus BUT the part time maid was coming so had to stay at home to let her in. haiz.


i was dying of boredom & heat. n of all days, thursday was such a super hot idiotic day. luckily i had my 'shopoholic & sister' book wif me man. no, i was not reading 'to kill a mockingbird' cos dat is only to read at nite to put me to sleep cos i'm having insomnia.


however, it was still too hot to read. & now it's raining. BLOODY HELL!!! it should've rained on thursday. not today!!!!!!!! grrrrrrrrr.


anyway, den i decided to sleep cos the stupid heat was aming me feel sleepy. i woke up when the part time maid had to go back. my clothes were SOAKED in SWEAT ok.


on the other hand, dis is a good way of losing weight without exercise. wahaha. like a sauna.

bleahh. now the tv in the living room is spoilt. dunno whether is due to the rain or wat. dammit. luckily dining room still got scv. :)


yesterday went to j8 wif yann. actually was to watch initial d. when we reached dere it was SELLING FAST, as said on the screen. but when we reached the counter, it was SOLD OUT. damn u, ppl who bought the last few tickets!!!!!!!!!


so we decided to watch mr & mrs smith. yann wanted to watch dat more than initial d anyway. mr & mrs smith was a nice show. is angelina jolie's lips for real?? dey look like she purposely pout dem or wat.



after the show we went to level 1 cos yann wanted to buy her sister's bdae present. i wanted to buy a bag or a watch. cos i'm running out of dem. in the end i bought a bag.


it's a NICEEEEE bag!!!! black, of course. i like the material. actually got another one which i wanted to buy instead of dis one. it has the same design BUT the style is diff. but the only volour dey had left is ORANGE!!!! i hate orange!!!! besides green of course. ok, i hate orange & green.


i bought it after wasting a lot of time in the shop. it was having a sale. for my bag it was 2 for $15. i shared wif yann. she bought a bag for her sister & for herself oso. den went next door & bought 6 crystal spider ear studs for $6 & a packet of ear stix for $1. my ear stix keep dropping out lor!! n if PPL confiscate my ear studs luckily i still got ear stix to stop it frm closing. haha. i put it in my card holder wif my eye drops n ez link n popular card. it has a lot lor!!! a lot of colours n diff thickness some more. so good.


i love the great singapore sale.


father ang & mother ang r now on a boat to batam for their 2nd honeymoon!!! wif sandy beaches... beautiful scenery.. delicious food... romantic atmosphere...



ok ok. dey're on a business trip lah. actually i was going but dem father ang said, 'go dere help me carry bags & see customer.'


OMG. no thanx man. n dun wanna be a lamp post oso.


dey're coming back tomorrow. I'M IN CHARGE, BABY!!!!!!!



hahahahahahahaha. i shall post a song.

wahaha. today is a good day.


early in the morning shouted--ok lah, not shouted lah.. toked loudly in an irritated way--to zul. cos i wanted to go n call nazruddin to ask y he still haven't come n zul said to me in an irritated way, 'can u pls put ur phone away?!'


den i said back loudly in an irritated way, 'going to call my member lah!! wat's ur problem???'



uh oh. i was feeling guilty the first 2 ++ hrs of the band practice. which was like, almost half of the whole practice. budden in the end my san kor & wu di made me forget abt it so i forgot abt it.



anyway me & zul r now in toking terms once again. sorry lah!!!


anyway. today during band practice ong said he read our blogs. *horrified* SHIT SIA. i was like in total shock lor. cos i complain complain so much abt him & band. & my juniors. my heart stopped beating for a few milliseconds. until ravi told me dat it was the band blog. I DIDN'T EVEN NOE BAND GOT BLOG LOR!!!! must be the theodore make one. later he link me how?!?!? must go n see sia. shit. forgot the add liao.


den after dat i wanted to bring my horn home. firdaus was supposed to carry to my house for me cos he still owed me one for losing the bet. the bet is dat he'd beat me in accounts for mid yr but he didn't, so HAHAHA. den he say he help me carry to sch gate only. -_-" den juz now i found out on msn dat he was only kidding lor!!! he wanted to help me carry back!!!!!! WAT THE HELL. my hands r now covered in blisters thanx to the stupid horn dat wears 5 kg or more.


n i signed in & signed out of the quartermaster bk. poor yongjin. i tink he wanted to bao xue guan. oopsies. must say sorry to him oso. wahh. dis post like dunno wat sia.


den after dat me, shu ling, lim & tan went to connie's house to practise instruments. connie was very patient, though. our playing sux.


BIG TIME.




hmm. ohh yeah. today i found out TWO secrets!! wahaha. OBVIOUSLY i cannot post it HERE. but if the reader wans to noe, u may come n beg me n MAYBE i'll tell u.



jaslin told me today dat sch is starting on 27th!!!! on MONDAY!! it's not even a FULL month lor!! bloody hell. haven't do hw yet!!! not a single one!! not even chatterji's one dat's supposed to pass up on first of june!! SOBX. luckily i do english liao. cos dat time i tot must pass up during the english workshop but in the end dun need so dun care.


speaking of english, juz started on to kill a mockingbird last nite. to kill a bloody mockingbird is bloody chim lor. i can't even form scenes in my mind lor!! cos usually when i read a book den scenes will form like a movie. BUT in dis STUPID book, not a single scene can be formed. ok ok, got lahh. um. forgot which part liao. oh yeah. the part where jem go n touch the 'haunted' radleys' house. oh well. english is deproving like hell.



forgettit. die den die lah.







INITIAL D OPENS TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!

yesterday was fathers' day.



went to eat indian food opp novena church. it was... a lot. sour. n spicy. claudia ang finished her whole plate!! can't believe it sia.


den after dat went to novena square. WALKED all the way dere, cos father ang didn't wanna give up his FREE parking space in novena church.


claudia ang was frantic cos she needed to buy her zuo wen bu. anyway. went to mph. i bought 2 books, 'every boy's got one' by meg cabot & 'to kill a mockingbird' by harper lee.


the 2nd book was influenced by anslem paul. actually i wanted to buy the 'empress orchid' by dunno who, but decided not to. maxine ang read the back n said, 'wah, sex book.'


PLS LOR!!! it is NOT sex book, for goodness sake. *rolls eyes*


the total bill came up to $95.12!!!! of course not only my 2 books lah!! claudia ang & maxine ang oso bought. actually is not maxine ang bought lah. is father ang choose for her cos she couldn't find anyting. must be fair ma.



ohh yeah. gave father ang his fathers' day present. he didn't noe how to unwrap it. wahaha. he was smiling away even before he opened it. still say dun wan us to give him anyting. dis proves dat men mean the opp of wat dey say. -_-" & dey say women r confusing. look who's toking!!!


den after dat-- wait.


NOTE: the following is advised not to be viewed by die-hard, devoted christians/catholics/protestants/watever it is dat has someting to do wif Christ. If the reader happens to die of a burst blood vessel after reading it, the writer will not be held responsible.


okies. now dat's done. u have been warned.


as i was saying. after shopping at novena square we were forced to go to church again. dis time is the whole family, INCLUDING maxine ang. she wanted to escape wif her MR M, but too late liaos. dis time is go novena church, not SFX.


reached dere more den 1 HOUR early. omg. it was so damn hot. i read my book, 'every boy's got 1'. started to feel sleepy.


den FINALLY it started. saw a very very cute altar boy. he sat the 1st seat frm the right. but too bad he too short liao. & looks too young.


other than the altar boy, it was sooo boring. i dunno how ppl can go to church at their own free will. the singing of hymns still ok lah, cos i nvr even sing. & wat is wif the stand, sit, kneel routine?!?! haiz.

n the priest looked so bloody arrogant. hmpf.


emmanuel & eduard, my nephews, came in halfway through the service. their parents r now currently in paris, leaving dem wif my poor cousin, roger.


dey r SO cute!!! emmanuel is becoming more & more shuai. eduard is becoming more & more stubborn.



after the service went to take pics wif dem. took many many pics but thanx to the stupid small memory of my phone, i had to delete some of dem. i chose the nicest one, though. the pic of me & emmanuel making monkey faces is now my main wallpaper display pic.


den WALKED back to novena square cos dey wanted to eat kfc. roger came wif us oso. dunno whether to type kor kor roger cos i always call him dat, but it sounds weird here. therefore i shall juz type roger.


after eating went back to novena church to get the car. father ang got angry cos he wanted roger to send emmanuel & eduard home cos he wanted to go straight home to watch the vcd we gave him. den after dat his car tyre punctured. wahaha. so roger sent us back.


when father ang & mother ang came home after pumping air into the tyre, father was not so angry anymore. mother ang, claudia ang & me watched The Bible: Jesus, wif him.



it was so bloody disgusting lor. the last part. the part where Jesus got his hands hammered. bleahx!! felt like vomitting even after the show ended. no wonder dey put PG on the cover sia.


the guy who acted as Jesus is quite shuai lor. if only he shaved off his stinking beard. so disgusting. can't stand beards or moustaches. so er xin lor. he tink wat, got beard dere den got sex appeal ah. pls!!


Judas is a bad boy. Peter is an even badder boy. wahaha. i like the guy who played Matthew. or was it Andrew?? oh well. one of em lah. very cute. but his voice a bit girly lor.



done here. wanna play the sims 2.

The Great Pretender
Freddie Mercury

Oh yes I'm the great pretender
Pretending I'm doing well
My need is such
I pretend too much
I'm lonely but no one can tell

Oh yes I'm the great pretender
Adrift in a world of my own
I play the game but to my real shame
You've left me to dream all alone

Too real is this feeling of make believe
Too real when I feel what my heart can't conceal

Ooh Ooh yes I'm the great pretender
Just laughing and gay like a clown
I seem to be what I'm not (you see)
I'm wearing my heart like a crown
Pretending that you're still around

Too real when I feel what my heart can't conceal

Oh yes I'm the great pretender
Just laughing and gay like a clown
I seem to be what I'm not you see
I'm wearing my heart like a crown
Pretending that you're
Pretending that you're still around

wheeeeeeeeeeeee. the initial d date is getting nearer & nearer!! wahaha. yann & me r gonna watch it next friday at j8 after band. that is, IF dere r tickets.


very long nvr go j8 liaos. r dere any big changes?



actually got nothing much to blog abt. when does the sch holidays end sia. every long holiday i oso dunno when end, but when the time comes, i'll noe. but i wanna noe now!! next next week izit.



haiz. i took so long to get used to not going to sch, & now i have to get used to going to sch. i tink when sch reopens it will suck. cos now no homeroom system liao. boring sia. must stay in one fixed classroom.... wif 1 fixed partner... sian or not?!!??!


worse of all, now oso no motivation, as i explained to yann, to go to sch. last time got lor. now dun have. haiz.


i shall post a song.

i have decided: i shall blog as & when i wan to, instead of waiting for 2 days to blog 1 time. it's so stupid.



anyway. my feet r aching. walked for abt 5 hrs wif li zhen at orchard at first, den walked to somerset. frm somerset went to bugis. i need a free foot massage, man.



omg. bugis village is selling crap. actually the plan was for me to buy linda & yijun's graudating present, & for li zhen to buy her brother's bdae present. but somehow we ended up shopping for ourselves. actually, i didn't really shop. juz walk around. wasted sia!!! walk for so long den nvr buy anyting. is either too ex or not even nice. dat's y i say bugis village is selling crap. bloody hell.



i was looking for a new bag. too bad, dun have wat i wanted. i tink only ice lemon tee sells wat kind of bags i like.


li zhen bought a pair of earrings. we ate so much today lor!! i tink dun need to eat lunch & breakfast for tomorrow. both of us have decided to drink water for lunch. cos i read in teens mag dat water cures hunger pangs. if i continue eating like today, the L size i ordered for the new band shirt wun be able to fit anymore.


**i have upgraded 1 size down!!!! wheee.



anyway. i m losing my voice. i dunno y oso. yesterday when i came back home frm band my voice become like dat liao. in sch oso not like dat lor!!! wah lauu.


i found out frm zhi jie dat hidayat is scared of me. hidayat!!! the big big guy dat plays the big big tuba. OMG. m i so scary? wahaha. i didn't noe dat. i was kind of surprised when zhi jie told me dat. oh well.



anyway, quote of the day. i wanted to blog abt dis but i kept forgetting:


"i wasn't born cool. it was dat i dared to try new tings dat i became more & more cool."


guess who said dat?? no prizes for the right answer, though.



yes, it is the wise man, JAY ZHOU JIE LUN!! actually, come to tink of it, i wouldn't say he's wise lah. musically-inclined, yes. but wise?? come on. wise ppl r creatures like albert einstein. the owl frm winnie-the-pooh.



come back to the point. i found perfect sense in dat quote. i wasn't born cool either. not to say dat i AM cool now, though. but definitely cooler than when i was in pri 5/pri 6/sec 1.


i tink in pri 5 i had a pinafore which was at the middle of my calves. n the first time i wore it, everybody was laughing at me. i tink. but watever. now, if my skirt even TOUCHED my knees when i was standing i would feel so damn bloody uncomfortable mannnn. sweet sweet teenagehood.




anyway, abt the other part of the quote: 'it was dat i dared to try new tings dat i became more & more cool.'



it was dat i dared to pierce. not dat piercing is a sign of coolness. nonono. it is.. um... a sign of.. self-expression. de-stressing. piercing is a better way of de-stressing than self-mutilation, rite? or smoking? (ppl who tink dat smoking is a sign of coolness r losers, btw)


i admit dat when zhou jie lun came out, his image SUCKED, ok. wat the HELL?? where the HELL did he get his disgustingly curly, thick mass of hair?!?!?!? dammit. big mistake.



now, he is, for sure, becoming more n more shuai. ok lah, not shuai lah. CUTE. like i said, his shy, CUTE, one dimpled smile.


n y is dat so?



bcos he DARED to try new tings. bcos he DARED to cut of his hair (ugh) n get a new hairstyle. bcos bcos bcos.


i dun care if ppl forced him to do it. i dun.

i noe, i noe. i remember wat i said abt me blogging once every 2 days. but it seems everytime i try to limit my blogging, someting happens. idiotic.


father ang dragged mother ang, claudia ang & me to church last nite. for some singing tingy.


the 1st ting dey flashed on the ohp was a pic of Jesus. looking closely, actually Jesus is quite shuai lor. if only he cut his hair. his hair makes him look like a girl. but come to tink of it, he is quite shuai lah. symmetrical face. baby smooth complexion. deep set eyes.


his eyebrows, i noticed, r perfect. i wonder if it's natural or he plucked it?


anyway. to continue. den dey started singing lah. it kind of reminds me of the heart of God church. only dat heart of God church is more fun. wif more ppl my age. i tink last nite only got 1 person my age lor, besides claudia ang. besides, heart of God church got more shuai ge some more. if only it was not so far, i would go every week man. have to take mrt some more. hate to take mrt. must walk so far.




a thought occurred to me when i was doodling on the paper dey gave me when the Fr. anselm pang was giving a speech abt obedience. how come altar boys must be boys? how come cannot be altar GIRLS??


so i asked father ang n he said dat cos only catholic priests can be men. so i asked how come only men can be priests. den he said cos when Jesus chose he 12 dunno wat (start wif p or wat, dunno how to spell.), dey were all men. so i asked y he nvr choose women.


n he got no answer.




sexist sia. hmpf.




i bet if women were priests, dey will be a thousand times better than the men.

Never Ever
All Saints

A few questions that I need to know
How you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what I've done wrong
And how long it's been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention
Or did I not give enough affection
Not only will your answers keep me sane
But I'll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face
Or even on the phone,
You can write it in a letter
Either way I have to know
Did I never treat you right?
Did I always start the fight?
Either way I'm going out of my mind
All the answers to my questions I have to find.

My head's spinnin'
Boy I'm in a daze
I feel isolated
Don't wanna communicate
I take a shower
I will scour
I will run
Find peace of mind
The happy mind
I once owned, yeah

Flexing vocabulary runs right through me
The alphabet runs right from A to Z
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can't find
I'm not crazy
I'm sure I ain't done nothing wrong, no
I'm just waiting,
Cos I heard that this feeling won't last that long

Chorus:
Never ever have I ever felt so low
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way I'm feeling yeah you got me feeling really bad
Never ever have I had to find
I've had to dig away to find my own peace of mind
I've never ever had my conscience to fight
The way I'm feeling yeah it just don't feel right

I'll keep searching
Deep within my soul
For all the answers
Don't wanna hurt no more
I need peace
Gotta feel at ease
Need to be
Free from pain
Going insane
My heart aches yeah

Sometimes vocabulary runs through my head
The alphabet runs right from A to Z
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can't find
I'm not crazy
I'm sure I ain't done, nothing wrong
Now I'ma just awaiting,
'Cause I heard that this feeling won't last that long

Repeat Chorus 3x

You can tell me to my face
You can tell me on the phone
Ooh you can write it in a letter babe
Cos I really need to know
You can write it in a letter babe
You can write it in a letter babe...

Why
M2M

Why won't you call me?
Are you afraid?
Your friends all told me
You think I'm all that.

Well, it don't make sense
It's just craziness
Ooh, I need to know where we're at.

Chorus:
Wondering why you're acting this way
Baby
Wondering why you don't have any words to say
Maybe someone told you a lie
Or maybe you're just being shy
Keep wondering why.

Why when you see me
You pretend I'm not there?
But when I see your eyes,
Somehow you seem to care.

Unbelievable,
Inconceivable.
Need to know if we're going anywhere.

Repeat chorus 2x

i m limiting my blogging to once in 2 days. cos dere's practically NOTHING to blog abt.


sch to starting in abt 2 weeks. FINALLY. i CANNOT stand BAND every SINGLE BLOODY day of my life. it's driving me nuts.



good news!! peipei (the dog) MIGHT be pregnant!!!!




on the other hand, i dun tink it's good news after all. cos she's like, 9 yrs old. quite old liao. n she's so small lor. smaller than average papillons. a LOT smaller den average papillons.


dere might be complications if she gave birth. i hope she only have 1 puppy can liao. thanx to junior. later the puppy come out half chihuahua half papillon sia.


i tink i'm gonna post a song.


no. i'm gonna post TWO songs!! 1 for 1 offer ma.

today went to ps to buy fathers' day present wif maxine & claudia ang. my feet r aching.


i hate to take mrt lor. frm my house must walk so far to the serangoon mrt station. idiotic. so HOT some more.


anyway. today i was in a shopping mood, which is unusual. but sadly, got no money. haiz. bought a duo lip gloss frm the body shop. was nice. pinkyish. cost $12.45, cos is 50% off i tink.


felt like buying shoes, but no money. :( i desperately need a pair of shoes. n more tops. HAIZ.


anyway, can't say wat we bought for father ang. dun say oso noe lor. still got wat else to buy sia.


AHHH!!! NEXT WEEK WHOLE WEEK GOT BAND!!!!! idiotic. remember wat i said abt loving band? i've changed my mind.


BAND SUX BIG TIME.



ppl wanna sleep one leh. whole day band band band not sian ah. must face those 3 idiotic juniors some more. n stupid percussion whole day make mistake. play a few bars only den must stop juz for dat stupid section. den replay again. den dey get it wrong must replay AGAIN.



GAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

still having insomnia, but not as bad anymore. now have to listen to zhou jie lun every nite before i can sleep.


i finally figured out wat i love abt zhou jie lun liao. it's not his looks. got many tings. firstly, it's his SMILE. his cute, shy, one dimpled smile. secondly, it's his HONESTY. at least he didn't deny dat his stubble in the zhi zhan zhi shang mtv was fake. n he oso faces up to the fact dat during his concerts, he cannot memorize his lyrics properly. n dat he cannot dance.

thirdly, it's his SINGING. no, his singing is not good. but it's the feeling he expresses. esp in slow songs, for ege, wa jie, an jing, gui ji, ge qian..

dat's actually the main points lah. i tinks till got more but still haven't tink yet.



so many days nvr use com liao. it feels good to be 'home', behind the monitor.


wednesday i went to do flag day. actually i dun need to do one. is shih yann dey all need. 3e3 & 3e4 ppl lah. ut i juz went wif dem cos i wanted to leave band early. :p

cos dat day got band frm 8 to 12. den we left at 10. haha. dat day didn't even play man. juz do warm up den ong come n explain dunno wat ting lah. for ONE HOUR. den when we wanna go liao den he wanna play pirates of the caribbean. he gu yi one lor.


den went to hougang cos dey must collect the tins n flags dere. not the whole class of 3e3 go. cos dey last time nvr do. cos tan siew eng dun let dem go. cos dat time got syf.

dis time the flag day is for youths under risks. dat's wat tan say. got a longer, more detailed explanation but cannot remember liao.

the 2 supervisors in charge of us were 2 guys called marshall & khairul. wahaha. dey so easy to bully one. frm acjc one. cos dey were wearing acjc shirts. not the uniform.

anyway, we went to causeway point to do. i tell u it's damn hot lor. n the ppl dere r so bloody ungenerous. i helped li zhen collect 50 cents!!! hahaha. dun xiao kan 50 cents ok...

finally we finish at 5++. den we went back to hougang to return the tins. on the bus 161 i played hangman wif li zhen & xerxes. stupid xerxes. he purposely wanna make me lose lor. hmpf.


n when i went home i was so damn tired although i didn't even do anyting. haha. n i slept like a baby. but sadly, the next morning had to wake up early cos got english lesson.


den after english lesson got band. sec 1s r slowly coming into the main band liao.



yesterday during band i almost bao xue guan lor. thanx to my 3 DEAR juniors. bloody hell. so idiotic lor. i was shouting away at dem.


n all 3 conductors saw. dat's wat dat bernard said anyway.



ARGHH. juz my luck. everytime dey see me is when i'm shouting at the juniors. later dey tink i always bully dem. but dat's not the truth lor!! is dey always bully me lor!!! idiotic.


later gonna cut hair liaos. i feel like shaving bald n let my hair regrow, but dun dare to. :s

i'm having insomnia these few days. haiz. oso dunno how i can go to sleep.


cos i couldn't sleep, i lay awake n listened to peipei's (the dog!!) breathing. every now & then she gave out snores, or purrs, or whines. i often hear cracker whimpering in his sleep, or junior snorting in his sleep, but i've nvr heard peipei making any kind of noise in her sleep. it's so cute. dogs oso have dreams & nightmares!!! awww. wonder wat dey dream abt.

anyway, dis reminds me of the opening lyrics of aerosmith's 'i dun wanna miss a ting':

"i could stay awake juz to hear u breathing
watch u smile while u r sleeping
wondering if it's me u're seeing."


maxine ang oso told em dat last time when she was awake until very very late, she saw all 3 dogs patrolling the house together!! is dat cute or wat?? dogs' minds work like humans' minds. i wonder which dog tot of the idea of patrolling the house. hmm.


but of all the dogs i've had, i still tink speedy is the smartest. speedy is the dog we had 5 yrs ago. he ran away on 6th Nov 2000. hais. until now i still tink he ran away cos he overheard me & mother ang toking abt the hdb guy. cos dunno which idiotic neighbour complain den the hdb guy come n say we can only keep 1 dog in a hdb flat. like, WATEVA.


den speedy overheard n so he made up a plan wif cracker n peipei (dat time junior was not here yet) to run away wif cracker. peipei stayed bcos..she's a girl lah!!

den on dat day he ran away wif cracker. dat cracker is so blur i tell u. we found him standing at the lift lobby of our block, looking around blurly.
-_-"


dat's wat i tink lah. is it my overactive imagination or wat sia.


back to the topic lah. as i was saying, i stayed awake listening to peipei's snores n breathing. den i put my hand over her heart. r dogs' hearts like humans, the heart abt the size of their fist? if yes, den peipei has a super small heart.abt the size of the big toe, only her paw is smaller.


peipei is so cute. ppl say a dog's lifespan is abt 15 yrs. dis yr peipei is 9 yrs. means she has abt 6 yrs. in 6 yrs i'll be 21!! i can't believe peipei grew up wif me. we got her when i was 6, in 1996.


omg i love peipei to bits.

watched mean girls on vcd during dinner. father ang bought it frm the world trade centre.


dat was a great show. maybe one of my favs. it taught me how to be bitchier.


aaron samuels is an idiot. such a bloody hypocrite lor. can't stand him. he's the guy regina & cady r fighting for. cady is lindsay lohan. regina is the other girl.


but i can't deny dat he's cute. not cute cute. not teddy bear cute, like ong jian guo. not cool cute like zhou jie lun. not pai kia cute like edison chen. i tink aaron samuels fits in the category of shuai cute. shuai, but yet cute. dis is a rare breed. many ppl fit in the teddy bear cute. i, for one, has been told by bhavaani n jaslin dat i m cute, as in teddy bear cute. unfortunately not cool cute, or pretty cute, or cute cute.


forgettit. it's getting complicated.


another example of a cute aaron. as i have explained in my previous post, i said i wanted to name my son aaron last time bcos i wanted him to grow up as cute/shuai as aaron aziz or aaron carter. now dere's another aaron samuels. oh, yeah, n aaron kwok oso. mother ang told me aaron kwok is in his forties. for goodness' sake. he looks like he's in his twenties man!! wonder wat miracle drug he takes to make him look so young. hmpf. so unfair.


geez.


i tink i'm the total opp man. when i was in pri 5, 6, sec 1, ppl told me i looked 16. n now,when i'm sec THREE, ppl tell me dat i m younger dat claudia ang. or claudia ang is older than me. i dunno if it's the height diff or wat. hate to admit it, but dat girl is like 1 head taller than me lor. bloody hell. y m i so bloody short?!?!!?!?

the point is, is it dat i look younger when i grow older?? oh no. later when i'm fifty i look like a BABY how??????


must jump more. go n buy skipping rope. dammit. i tink i only grew like 1 cm in three yrs.

ARGHHH. nothing to blog abt.


stupid friendster is lagging again. stupid cracker is barking for no reason again. stupid me is reminiscing again.



i watched lizzie mcguire again. but dis time is not marathon. disney channel showed reruns of the show. hilary duff looked so cute last time. n gordo, whose real name is adam lamberg, is even cuter.


nvm. i wun blog abt wat i did today. so boring. who wans to noe anyway.


i remember last time when i was young i hated my name. cos ppl were always mispronouncing it. n it sounded so disgustingly awful. cos when i was in pri sch everyone called me 'a-rex-sis'. YUCK, pls.


so i told my mother i wanted to change my name. to caroline. (tinking back now, i should have chosen a better name.) i dunno y i wanted dat name anyway.


anyway, my mother juz laughed. n my uncle, who was dere, started calling me caroline for a short while. after dat he stopped n called me chicken rice girl. cos i loved to eat chicken rice last time. wif the skin. so fattening. no wonder now so fat. hmpf.


anyway, the point of dis is dat it teaches me not to name my children such complicated names cos dey will juz grow up to hate their name.


after dat, someone asked me wat i wanted to name my children next time. i tink it was my sister. at dat time, i said if i had a boy i would name him aaron. bcos all the aarons around me were so cute. dat was when i was 10 or 11 i tink. for example, aaron aziz. aaron carter. i said if i named my son aaron, he would grow up as cute or as handsome as aaron aziz or aaron carter.

n if i had a girl, i would name her alexandra. dun ask me y. i tink it's bcos in my mind, alexandra was like a female warrior's name. like alexander the great or someting. the female version of alexander the great. who knew i was such a feminist when i was only 10???


den i changed my mind. i didn't wanna name my son aaron. or my daughter alexandra. i wanted to name my son jason. n my daughter samantha.


den i fell in love wif guys' names started wif j (not jack or john pls). jason. jeremy. jay.


den after dat i changed my mind again. i didn't wanna name my son jason cos of jason hsu, or otherwise known as xu meng ze of 5566. i used to like xu meng ze, den i changed my mind. dat's y.



dat's when i decided i would leave the baby naming to the future me. n the future husband. dat is, if dey real parents of the the baby haven't given him/her a name.


cos i'm gonna adopt my child. i can't imagine myself getting pregnant. it's a disgusting process. n the pain!!!!! omg. ouch. i feel weak.



*shudder* i dun wanna tink abt it.



so. dis has been another reminiscing episode of thebitchnextdoor.blogspot.com. tune in again next time to find out more.

i dunno y i'm here, at dis web pg. i dun even noe wat to blog abt!!! hais.


ermm...


okies.



yesterday went out wif tan, lim & ng after band. lim & ng didn't come for band. cos band is frm 8 to 12 n dey got maths at 8 to 10 den english at 10.30 to 12. i tink. tan came to band late cos she got maths but didn't have to go for english. dat reminds me.


I M NVR GONNA BLOG ABT STEVEN WONG AGAIN.


i can tink of a thousand tings to say abt dat now but i dun wanna. later kana hunted down again. :s


anyway. den after band me n tan went to meet lim n ng. den went to heartland. i can't believe it!! i witnessed the sight of joline ng piercing her FIRST HOLE!!!! *gasp* i m overwhelmed wif emotions. it is a memorial moment.



bleahx. enough of sarcasm. anyway. as i was saying, joline ng pierced her first hole yesterday. after the first piercing, cos she pierced both ears of course, she looked like she wanna cry. really. den after the 2nd piercing den ok liaos. i was deciding whether to pierce or not. stupid tan. say wanna pierce den in the end nvr pierce. i pierced in the end. it is safe to tok abt my piercing now cos mother ang has found out. she found out earlier than i expected. i tot she'll find out like months later, which she usually does, so i dun wanna blog abt my piercing IN CASE maxine ang or claudia ang reads dis n den i'll DIE.


i tink mother ang really dun care anymore. hahas. she found out last nite when i was watching yin cha yang cuo. hanyu pinyin correct rite???? nowadays i dunno y she likes to look at my ears. to admire my studs i guess. :p cos my piercings r very nice. my right ear now looks like a display show or someting. so sparkling wif all my fake crystal studs. den she looked at my ear n said, "u reopen dat hole ah?" cos last time i pierced the side of my ear but den closed it again cos got infection. den yesterday repierce mahh. den i said, "no, i repierce." den she open her eyes big big n said, "huh?!!? u repierce?? u mad ah u??" wahaha. dat's all.



den after piercing, which was so damn pain, even painer than the first time, tan went home cos lim, ng n me were gonna watch monster in-law at ps. tan always whole day dun wanna watch movie one lah. whole day support piracy only. hmpf.


monster in-law was quite funny. no, it was VERY funny. i saw my pri sch frens, huishan n kimberley at the popcorn dere. at first dey call my name den dey turn around. when i saw dem i was like, who r dey man?? den i suddenly remember lor.


kimberley has FIVE ear holes n ONE nose stud!!!! *gasp* pai kia sia.... tsk tsk. kids these days r getting worse n worse!!!!!! wat is the world coming to?!!?!?!?


wahahahaha. anyway we chatted for a while n dey were oso gonna watch monster in-law, but dey were sitting in the front row. so poor ting. j lo's acting was not as stiff as 'shall we dance?'.



today oso had band. stupid lah!!!! xerxes said theodore ordered the soundtrack of the incredibles. bleah. dat's the WORST song i've ever heard ok. the whole band was like so bloody confused. speaking of dat, ong didn't come today. so quek took over. he was damn funny. classical cannon is the best!!!! i love dat song. i hope we nvr play the incredibles again.


dat theodore is organizing a bbq. not many ppl wanted to go when ravi asked today. but still got ppl wanna go lah. haiz. have to collect money again. sian. sure got ppl whole day dun wanna pay up one lah. wanna go den dun wanna pay. bloody hell.


n yiting told me if the band short of funds the treasurer must pay out of the own pocket leh!!!! wah lauu. n cannot collect funds frm the band some more. tan siew eng say one. n dis morning when i gave her the money for the collar pins she forgot dat the band still owe her money lor!!! omg. should have juz taken the money n go shopping spree sia. wahaha. but i'm such an honest girl!!!! hee.



tomorrow got band again. do u realize dat dis week the only day we didn't have band was on tuesday?!?!? but have band better lah. better than staying at home. if stay at home den whole day watch tv, eat, play com. my butt sure become bigger one. but den again at band oso the whole day sit one wat. at band even WORSE ah. so smelly some more. n squeezy. i at home take up the whole sofa oso no one care ah. n at band oso kana molested sia. haiz.


but i still prefer going band. must remind dat weng lin not to put the chairs so close together again. i'm in trauma. *shudder*